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Saturday, October 29, 2011

THE CANDY STORY

With Halloween a few days off, I’ve had “candy” on my mind. 
Balance is a key to life, and balance is what I try to provide on my blog.  Now, I know sugar is bad for you and I think we should keep it at a minimum in children’s lives.  However, I also think it can become the “forbidden fruit” if we don’t remember “all things in moderation.”

As adults we often have “childhood amnesia.”  By that I mean we forget what it’s like to be a child and think like a child.  Children love candy.  They just do!  I was on a plane one time and a little girl was screaming bloody murder and driving all the passengers crazy.  I happened to have a small bag of M&M’s with me and I asked the mother if I could give them to her child.  The mother said, “Yes, and get me a gin and tonic while you’re at it!!!”   I leaned over to the little girl and said, “I like candy, do you?  What’s your favorite kind?  Would you like some of my candy?”  Well, she stopped crying and became a happy little camper.  And the rest of the plane was happy as well!

K.J. and I were talking about Christmas and he said he could hardly wait for the toys and candy.  I asked him which one he liked best and he emphatically said, “Candy!  Candy is better than toys!”  Go figure!

Nutritionists and psychologists are probably cringing if they are reading my blog.  But that’s the way it is.  You teachers who are on the front line every day in your classroom know exactly what I am talking about.

So, where am I going with all this?  I have a candy story for you.  I would NEVER use this with children.  In fact, I had forgotten all about this story until someone emailed recently asking for a copy of it.    It might be fun to use at a faculty meeting to add a little energy and laughter.  And, you might be surprised that grown-ups like candy as well!

A DAY IN THE LIFE OF A TEACHER

(You will need to buy Twizzlers, Snickers, Twix, a Tootsie Roll, Crunch, 100 Grand, Starburst, Sugar Babies, Baby Ruth, 5th Avenue, Watchamacallit, Mounds, Hugs, Kisses, Skittles, 3 Musketeers, Good and Plenty, Lifesavers, and Pay Day.  If you can’t find everything just eliminate it from the story.  The first teacher to raise her hand when a candy bar is mentioned gets the treat.)

Your alarm goes off long before you are ready to get up.  It really doesn’t matter what time it is – you still are not ready to get up.  But you go through the motions of getting ready and before you realize it you are already at school.  You walk in the door and are twisted and pulled in ten different directions – just like Twizzlers.  The sink in the room is stopped up, a mother wants to have a long discussion with you, and here come the twins, also known as the Sugar Babies, who are on a sugar high.  It’s barely 8:30 and you can tell it’s going to be one of those days.

As you settle into the morning routine, out of the corner of your eye you notice the school guinea pigs, Skittles and Snickers, are trying to break out of their cage.  Luckily, Ms. Baby Ruth, your wonderful team teacher, catches them and secures the cage.  The Three Musketeers, Todd, Robert, and Jeremy, are having a contest over who can run the fastest and Anna and Maria are arguing over who’s coming to their birthday party.  You smile and pat yourself on the back for “rolling with it” just like a Tootsie Roll.

Twix answering an email and welcoming a new child, the teacher next door wants you to come see the store she set up in the math center.  “Oh, Miss King,” you exclaim, “It looks just like 5th Avenue.”  The books you ordered three months ago have just arrived and the children thank you for Good and Plenty things to read.  One child is looking for a particular book, but he can’ seem to remember the title.  “You know, you know, the one with the Watchamacallit on it.”  He’s getting really frustrated when one of the other children finds it.  “You’re such a Lifesaver,” you say.

The day proceeds without a major incident.  Well, if you don’t call Kevin dumping a jar of glitter all over the floor.  Every time you walk you feel a Crunch.  After lunch you get a Starburst of energy and begin on the Mounds of testing that must be done. 

When the children finally leave there is a knock on your door and in walks your principal.  Today is Pay Day!  You open your envelope and realize you will never be paid for what you are worth – even if they paid you 100 Grand.  So here are some Hugs and Kisses (pass these out to everyone) to thank you for what you do!